|LADDER TO SUCCESS
|A man was walking along the street when he saw a ladder going into the
clouds. As any of us would do, he climbed the ladder. He reached a cloud,
upon which sat a rather plump and very ugly woman. "Screw me or climb the
ladder to success," she said.
No contest, thought the man, so he climbed the ladder to the next cloud. On
this cloud was a slightly thinner woman, who was slightly easier on the
"Screw me hard or climb the ladder to success," she said. "Well," thought
the man, "might as well carry on." On the next cloud was an even more
attractive lady who, this time, was quite attractive. "Screw me now or
climb the ladder to success," she uttered.
As he turned her down and went on up the ladder, the man thought to himself
that this was getting better the further he went.
On the next cloud was an absolute beauty. Slim, attractive, the lot. "Fuck
me here and now or climb the ladder to success," she flirted. Unable to imagine
what could be waiting, and being a gambling man, he decided to climb again.
When he reached the next cloud, there was a 400 pound ugly man, arm pit hair
showing, flies buzzing around his meat and ass. "Who are you?" the man
"Hello" said the ugly fat man, "I'm Cess!"
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A diet for Blondes
A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. "I want
you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this
procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least
When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds. "Why, ...