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THE ENGINEER 
Lawyer Jokes
An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his
dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer-you're in the wrong place." So
the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the
engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts
designing and building improvements.

After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and
escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy. One day God calls
Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down
there in hell?"

Satan replies, "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning
and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer
is going to come up with next."

God replies, "What???? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake-he
should never have gotten down there; send him up here."

Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm
keeping him."

God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue."

Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are
you going to get a lawyer?"


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Random Joke
Give 103%
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:
What makes 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.
How about achieving 103%?
...

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