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BEWARE OF VOICES 
Religion Jokes

An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded
by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying his situation, he
says quietly to himself, "I'm screwed." There is a ray of light from
the sky and a voice booms out: "No you are NOT screwed. Pick up that
stone in front of you and bash the head of the chief." So the
explorer picks up the stone and proceedes to bash in the head of the
chief. He is breathing heavily while standing above the lifeless
body. Surrounding him are the 100 native warriors with a look of
shock on their faces.

The voice booms out again: "Okay.......NOW you're screwed!"

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Random Joke
In the elevator
SAD THINGS TO DO IN AN ELEVATOR:
* When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the
shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
* Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go
back for more.
* Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push...

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