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TEST TAKING SKILLS EXAM 
Misc. Jokes
Part 1- Multiple Choice Tests

1. When taking a multiple choice test you should always
a) Eliminate the answers which you know are wrong then choose then most
correct answer.
b) Choose the most correct answers then eliminate the ones which are most
wrong.
c) Eliminate the answers which are the most wrong and choose the one you
know is correct.
d) Choose the answers that are probably right and use the least wrong of
them.

2. The best answer is always
a) The longest one.
b) The shortest one because it is more concise and clearly written.
c) The second to longest answer.
d) The second to shortest one because it is not too simple.

3. When you must guess between all four answers:
a) "c" is generally a good guess.
b) "d" is generally a good guess.
c) "c" is generally a poor guess.
d) "d" is generally a poor guess.

4. When all the answers for a question seem correct you should:
a) Answer your first impulse.
b) Skip it and come back
c) Choose your answers according to your answers in question 2 and 3.
d) Not answer it at all.

5. Another good idea when your guessing is to:
a) Choose generalizations because they are ALWAYS correct.
b) Choose more specific answers because they are generally more correct.
c) Avoid generalizations because they are usually wrong.
d) Avoid specifica answers because they are ALWAYS wrong.

6. Is "none of the above" a good answer?
a) Yes.
b) Usually.
c) If your not sure.
d) None of the above.

7. Is "all of the above" a good answer?
a) It is never a correct answer
b) Sometimes, depending on the test your taking.
c) If a, b, and c, are correct.
d) All of the above.

8. Is it better to answer:
a) Correctly.
b) To the best of your ability.
c) Both "a" and "b."
d) All of the above.

9. Which is generally the most correct answer?
a) None of the below.
b) Both "a" and "c."
c) Niether "b" nor "d."
d) All of the above.

10. When you get to the last question in a section should you:
a) Pick your nose and not do it.
b) Forget it and go back and check you answers in that section.
c) Skip it and go on to the next section.
d) Not answer it.

Section 2- True/False Tests

1. True or False. If your not sure on a true/false test, never guess.
2. True or False. False is ALWAYS a good answer.
3. True or False. Short statements are false.
4. True or False. Very long statements tend to be false because they are
too detailed and more prone to have numerous mistakes
in them. If you come to a question such as this, either
skip it or answer false because you'll get a better score
that way.
5. True or False. You should never answer according to your first impulse.
6. True or False. Complex statements, such as this one, have hidden
meanings that could make them false.
7. True or False. Generalizations are usually false.
8. True or False. When a statement is sometimes true and sometimes false
you should answer false.
9. True or False. True is always a good answer.
10. True or False. When a test is driving you insane, you should either
avoid answering stupid statements or answer them "false."

Section 4- Short Answer Tests

1) When you encounter an error in your test, no matter how small, give at
least 5 reasons you should you throw it away and ask for a new one.




2. Should your answers be written in complete sentences, or just in short
phrases? If you think the former is correct, write down the seven words you
should never begin your
sentences with. If you think the latter is correct, write 3 paragraphs
telling why.








3. When extremely complicated and unclear, how should a question be over and
over again for your understanding read so you know what it's trying to ask
for so you can be clearer in your answer for what reasons?




4. Why do simple questions require simple answers? Answer it at least 4
complete sentences.









5. Do you like answering opinion questions? Give 10 reasons for your
answer.






6. How good are you at answering questions dealing with your mental
abilities? Why? How do you usually answer a question about the way you do
things? Why do multiple questions for a single number require no more than
one answer which covers them all?



7. When there isn't enough space for answer, should you write in the margin.
If not, why (in at least two paragraphs)?

8. Why should you fill the entire space after a question? Answer in one
complete sentence.













9. Why should you never write large just to fill the space?




10. Why should you never write small just to fit everything in?


Section 6 Essays- Essay Questions
(choose 1- on a seperate sheet of paper)

1. What do you think of people who have poor counting abilities? (233
words)
2. Why should you always choose to answer questions which have nothing to do
with the topic? (100 words)
3. Rite a essay concerned the proper techniques and grammer your using too
rite a essay.
(100 words, more or less)
4. Why should you always do two essays just incase you mess up on one?
(100 words or more)
5. Should you always choose to answer the essay question whose answer is
"no"? Why?
(150 words or more)
6. Give 10 reasons why you should always have 5 paragraphs in your essay
dealing with each part of your answer individually. (200 words or more)
7. What are the reasons that essays are hard? (20 words or less)
8. Give at least three good examples of swear words you should NEVER use in
your essay because they could cause you to fail, even if they are used
in context. (3-20 words)
9. Tell how this essay relates to the subject of this test and why it is
difficult to answer if you
are stupid. (100 words)
10. Why do you always fail the test when you answer with less words than was
required.
(700 words)



The Survey Survey

This is a voluntary survey for research on how people take surveys. Please
answer all questions by circling the letter of the most accurate answer with
a pen.

1. Do you like taking surveys?
a. Never
b. Sometimes
c. Just the cool ones
d. Always
e. Undecided
2. When you recieve a survey in the mail, what do you usually do?
a. Answer it and send it in.
b. Throw it away.
c. Don't answer it and send it in.
d. Answer "undecided" to all the questions and send it in.
e. Undecided
3. If your desired response is not listed below the question, what do you do
about it?
a. Choose a random answer.
b. Eat a carrot.
c. Swear obscenely.
d. Kick your dog.
e. Answer 'a.'
4. Do you ever have skip insulting questions because of your stupidity?
a. Always, because they hurt my feelings.
b. Never, because I have no feelings. I am a psychopath.
5. Do you ever answer 'undecided?'
a. To every question.
b. If I feel gay.
c. When above your questions make no sense.
d. If the survey writer is a retard.
e. Undecided
6. How often do you take surveys?
a. I avoid them at all costs
b. If I absolutely must.
c. Always
d. When I recieve one in the mail.
e. Undecided
7. If two responses are both true, what do you do?
a. Circle the one which is most correct.
b. Circle the one which is least correct.
c. Put a circle around the most accurate answer.
d. Answer undecided.
e. Undecided.
8. What are you answering this survey with?
a. Pencil
b. Other (Next question on back.)





c. Both
d. Pen
e. Undecided
9. Why do you never scribble out mistakes?
a. Because I know how pissed off it makes you guys.
b. Because I know the question won't count.
c. Because I know my survey won't count.
d. But I DO scribble them out.
e. Undecided
10. When a question is implying something untrue, why do you answer it
anyway?
a. For fun.
b. Because I have to.
c. I have no self-control.
d. I am a dummy.
e. What are you implying?
11. How do you answer surveys?
a. Truthfully
b. Falsely
c. Randomly
d. With a crayon
e. I don't
f. Undecided
12. What do you think when you see the results of a survey or poll?
a. They didn't give enough answer choices.
b. How can the percentages only add up to 40?
c. Are 62% of people really stupid enough to give that answer?
d. I like reading survey results. They are interesting.
e. If that's what 62% of the people surveyed think, then I had better
think so too.
f. Undecided

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