CATEGORIES
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THE TRUTH ABOUT MARRIAGE
Men vs. Women Jokes
The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!"
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In the beginning, God created earth and rested. Then God created man
and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God nor man
has rested.
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My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state
troopers and a dog.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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What is the difference between a dog and a fox?
About 5 drinks.
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A beggar walked up to a well dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive
and said "I haven't eaten anything in four days." She looked at him and
said, "God, I wish I had your willpower."
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Do you know the punishment for bigamy?
Two Mother-in-laws.
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Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a
man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in
every country, son.
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A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified: "Wife wanted". Next day he
received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can
have mine."
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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget
it once.
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First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
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How do most men define marriage?
An expensive way to get laundry done for free.
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life
thinking they had no faults at all.
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If you want your wife to listen and pay undivided attention to every
word you say, talk in your sleep.
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Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was
until I got married; and then it was too late."
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A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
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The bumper sticker read: "I lost 250 pounds in one day, I divorced
her."
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street
with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful.
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