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BEAUTIFUL! 
Little Johnny Jokes
One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show
of hands for who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my
mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher.
She then called on little Michael. "My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and
it
turned out beautifully," he said.
"Excellent, Michael!"
Then, the teacher called on little Johnny.
"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was
pregnant, and
he said, 'Beautiful, fucking beautiful!'"


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Random Joke
Moving Day
Tragically, three friends die in a car crash, and they find themselves at
the gates of heaven. Before entering, they are each asked a question by St.
Peter.

"When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you,
what would you like to hear them say about you?", asks St. Pet...

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