Due to the recent merger of AOL and Time Warner, AOL members can soon
expect the following changes:
* Time Magazine's next "Man Of The Year" issue will feature Steve
Case on the cover as the undisputed winner. This of course will
strictly be a coincidence.
* The standard irritating AOL popups will be replaced by Warner Bros.
cartoons. Now, Elmer Fudd will say, "You cwazy wabbit, you've been
onwine for 5 minutes and that's way-y-y too long... we're going to
boot you off!"
* When you try to access a web site that AOL blocks because they know
that you are too stupid to think for yourself, Tweety Bird will say,
"I tawt I taw a Puddy... I did, I did see a Puddy... ACCESS IS
* The next time that you hear Bugs Bunny say, "Eh, what's up Doc?" he
will be referring to your monthly AOL subscription charge.
* Now that AOL owns everything, there is no one left for them to sell
your private and personal information to. Therefore, they will now use
that information to obtain a mandatory AOL Visa card in your name and
make purchases on your behalf and bill you whatever they want whether
you like it or not.
* Now, when you turn off your TV set, AOL will automatically download
television programs without your permission and delete the channels of
competitors that they don't want you to watch. Of course the next
logical step will be popup ads on the screen while you're trying to
watch your favorite show, and the inevitable outcome will be...
"You've been watching TV for too long, your connection has been
And this my friends... is just the beginning!
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Pround Blonde Student
A girl came skipping home FROM school one day. "Mommy, Mommy," she
yelled, "we were counting today, and all the other kids could only
count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9,
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"
"Yes, Honey, i...