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At the Bar Jokes
A well-dressed gentleman entered an upscale restaurant in the East End of
Manhattan, and took a seat at the bar.
The bartender came over and asked "What can I get you to drink, sir"?
The gentleman responded, "Nothing, thank you. I tried alcohol once, didn't
like it, and never tried it again".
The bartender was a bit perplexed, but being a friendly, outgoing sort, he
pulled out a pack of cigarettes and offered the gentleman a cigarette.
The gentleman refused, saying, "I tried smoking once, didn't like it, and
never did it again. The point is, I wouldn't be in here at all, except that
I'm waiting for my son".
The bartender retorted, "Your only child, I presume"!

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Random Joke
LA Times
Actual article from the LA Times:

"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only
trying to retrieve the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told bemused doctors in
the Severe Burn Unit of the Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his
homosexual partner Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, h...

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