|A preacher wanted to raise money for his church and on being told that
there was a fortune in horse racing, decided to purchase one and enter
it in the races. However at the local auction, the going price for
horses was so high that he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured
that since he had it, he might as well go ahead and enter it in the
races. To his surprise, the donkey came in third! The next day the
local paper carried this headline:
PREACHER'S ASS SHOWS
The preacher was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the
race again, and this time it won. The paper read:
PREACHER'S ASS OUT IN FRONT
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the
preacher not to enter the donkey in another race.
The paper headline read:
BISHOP SCRATCHES PREACHER'S ASS
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the preacher to get rid
of the donkey. The preacher decided to give it to a nun in a nearby
convent. The paper headline the next day read:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN
The Bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid
of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.00.
Next day the headline read:
NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.00
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the
donkey, lead it to the plains where it could run wild and free. Next
day, the headline in the paper read:
NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE
The Bishop was buried the next day.
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The Nursing Home
One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing
home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for.
The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set
her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK,
but after a while...